Monday, February 14, 2011
During my last pregnancy, my husband and I developed an unhealthy obsession with the HBO series The Wire. There are 5 seasons and I swear we watched all of them in a two week period. They are an hour long with no commercial interruptions and there are about 14 episodes per season. We will never get that time back. But I don't care.
We were like the crackheads portrayed in the series. I would rush around the various Upper Arlington libraries piecing together each season. (There are about three disks per season and I did NOT want to run out.) There was actually a time where we finished a disc and I had to have more so I went to the Miller Park Library and pounded on their door as they were turning off their lights. " I am an Upper Arlington taxpayer!" I screamed. Obviously, I don't go there anymore. I just keep telling my kids it is still under construction.
Normally, my husband and I go to bed pretty early - especially when you are pregnant with two really young kids. One would think you would be exhausted. But all I could think about when I kissed them goodnight was The Wire. My husband would be waiting for me, disk in hand as I raced through their bedtime stories. We were doin" three, four, five episodes a night. It was SICK. If one of us lost consciousness late at night, the other one would shake them saying "Just finish this. Just finish this." I never paid for an episode, though, man - THAT I can be proud of.
The funny thing is that my Dad had been trying to turn me on to The Wire for years. "That's a good show, boy. I ain't kiddin' ya." I love him. So once Brad and I got addicted, we would call him on the phone to discuss extensively the lives of the characters and the plotlines or whatever. The characters began to infiltrate my life. I began speaking like them to express myself.
"I'm unna pop a cap in yo' ass if you don't give my chil' afternoon preschool, beeach." I would say when it was my turn to sign up my middle child for the following year.
When a fellow mother with her baby on her hip dropped her jaw on the floor, "WhatCHU lookin' at, ho?"
"Ain nuthin' butta thang." I would reply when the kids in my carpool thanked me for dropping them off. What was happening to us? We were in this downward spiral and I had a new baby on the way.
I would daydream about Colonel Daniels and the gang, and chuckle to myself about what witty thing McNulty said to Detective Greggs during a drug raid. One of the characters, Bunk, would always respond to something someone said that he thought was bullshit by saying, "Sheeeeeeit".
My husband and I LOVED it. We would anticipate it in certain situations during an episode and say it along with him. We would rewind it over and over and over and laugh. It became our inside joke around the house.
"You need to take the recycling out, Brad."
"I'm going to the hockey game this Thursday. I am taking a client."
It was all fun and games until one day I was making lunch for my three-year-old and it was like the 100th day in a row she had had tuna salad. I was rummaging around in the pantry, only to realize that we were out of tuna. When I told her so, she paused for a split second, opened her sweet little mouth and replied, "Sheeeeeeit."
Rent The Wire at your local library or at Blockbuster or Netflix or whatever. I think if you have "On Demand", some episodes are still available there, too. It is the best show I have EVER seen - even better than The Sopranos, I think, and yes I know, that is a strong statement. You need to start at the very beginning, though. Don't try and jump in on the third season or you will get confused and you won't stick with it. Listen to what I am sayin' to you, Man. I ain't frontin'.