Being on the Periphery

Angie and Todd, her husband, who I equally adore.

I like being on the periphery.  I live in a mid-sized city, in Middle America, in my mid-sized house, driving a mid-sized SUV, in a mid-sized tax bracket, wearing my Medium clothes.  When did I just stop trying to fit into a small?  I don't even try them on anymore.  When I was in my twenties and thirties, my ass was squeezing into xs's when I had no business even looking at the smalls.

I was in my late twenties, and my friend, Angela, and I used to go to Loehmann's, pronounced, "da loehman", oh, I don't know, about once a week.  Did you get that?  ONCE A WEEK.  Insane.  We would go to Estate Sales, in between, and sometimes, Angela would take me on Dallas tours, showing me "the spillway" or some random high rise with "history".  She was all about promoting Dallas to me, because all I saw was a sea of boob jobs and sugar daddies.

I have the Dallas Junior League cookbook (It is a hobby of mine, when I go to a large city, now, to get their Junior League Cookbook), with an inscription from her that says, "As if you needed more Dallas propaganda.  Love, Angela."

We worked together at the Dallas Business Journal, but we really met at a Girls weekend at a Lake House.  It was one of the most bizarre weekends I have ever had.  But, it was also one of the best, because that is where I met one of my best friends, Angela. We bonded over all sorts of random things, and we were continuously amazed, as we poured our hearts out to each other, how many painful memories we had in common.  I may seem like I am speaking in code, but if only Angela gets this post, then it will have been a success.

One of the funniest memories I have about that weekend is that there were all of these gigantic flamingos and zebras and giraffes and shit all around the house.  We were at my co-worker, Leslie's uncle's lake house, and I remember they were so rich that they kept a Mercedes and a Yukon at the house, you know, just in case.

I know it sounds disrespectful that Angela and I kept laughing about the random decor, when we were staying FO' FREE at this amazing Lake House, stocked full of liquor, with a room for each of us, but the random wooden and metal wildlife scattered throughout their home was just too obvious a target for the two of us.  I mean, the animals weren't even indigenous to the region.   It was absurd!

Anyway, the night culminated in Aaaaauuunnnnngggiiiee (she is known as this in her very inner circle) and I arranging all of the animals in this co-worker's bedroom, who we, at the time, thought was passed out, and giggling our asses off when the (psycho) co-worker started freaking out, screaming at us that we were "immature" and "inconsiderate".  AAAuunnnngggiiee then threw up for the next three hours.

Good times.

 I have a 2 hour and  FIFTEEN minute interlude, Monday thru Thursday, and I still seem to remain at home, most of that time, doing bullshit that I would NEVER normally do, if my kids were with me.

Namely, one, this blog.  I usually am better at writing at night and early morning.  That way you get the ying yang of me fueled by either wine or coffee.  You decide which is which.

God, I miss just running around with a friend during the day.  That is probably one of my favorite pastimes.  No lie.  I hardly ever do it anymore and when I do, sparks fly.

I mean, shit, I did an entire post, almost, on going to a boutique.  It was the highlight of my week.  I cannot tell you what I did the rest of that week, because it is all redundant and slushy, but I can tell you what it felt like, in nauseating detail, to enter that boutique with lipstick on.

I think the winter is getting to me.  It has not been harsh.  It's been the antithesis of harsh, really.  It's just been different, and almost surreal, in a way.

Don't get me wrong.  I love the "holing up" that winter promises. But, in order to do that, I need below freezing temperatures and snow, Goddammit.  I cannot fully justify watching my dog shit in my yard for the umpteenth time, when other people are walking by in light layers with their dogs.  Give it a rest, peeps, just pretend it is winter, for Pete's sake.  I just realized the "Pete" I always refer to is probably a Biblical figure.  Peter was an apostle, I think.  I need to wiki that.

Anyway, I just reconnected with Angela this evening through my post about Whitney Houston, for starters.  I missed her fortieth birthday, due to family commitments and circumstances, and miraculously, we were able to "pick back up where we left off" like we always do, with the magic of text messaging.

Here is why I will always have a thing for her.  Our conversation was as follows:

Angela:  Love the latest post!  I too am mourning Whitney "I believe the children are our future" Houston.  Although I find that when I hear the song, I think of Sexual Chocolate and not Whitney.  Hmmm.  Went estate saling today.  No ninos. (That was the sign that was always prominently displayed on the front door of estate sales in Dallas.  We didn't have any.  So we were ALL GOOD.) Thought of my girl Undawood.  Wanna chat in the morning for cawfee tawk?"  xox

Me:  Miss you so much!  Will come out and celebrate ur burfday later this year.  U have always gotten me.  U know, embraced the dark side.

Auunnngggiiee:  We do embrace da dawwk side, don't we?"  Love you.  Been thinking of you guys.

I, then, sent her this viral pic I got through text.

Whitney Houston's Candlelight Vigil.  I know...inappropriate.  I'm clearly going to hell.

This is what I got back.  Typical AAAUUUNNNGGGIEEE.

Me:  Where yo spoon at?

Auuunnggee: (verbatim, this time.  I have been editing.  I'll admit.)  I shoot dat shit.  Crack is whack!  I got too much class to be burnin.

Me:  Stillllll got it, Aunnnggiieee. 

Anyway, when I met Angie, Brad and I had moved around a lot and I was used to being on the periphery.  Angela was the first new friend I had met since college, and it was not due to proximity or class schedules, or mutual friends, even.  It was not a convenient relationship.  It was one of choice.  What I mean by that is that we had a ton in common and a ton not in common, but we GOT each other and we had an absolute BALL together.  Another thing we always have had is that we can give each other shit, without the other one getting all sensitive - you know, the kind of ribbing when there is some truth to it, so the humor softens the blow. 

It's just like they are always saying on The Bachelor, you either have that connection, or you don't.  I like to quote Chris Harrison, instead of famous thinkers.  It's a downfall of mine. 

Aaauunnggiie, it has been too long.  This is my love letter to you to let you know how important you are to me, even though we are not in constant contact. 

You are the gold standard for meeting new people, in my eyes.  It is a lot to live up to.

If you have someone in your life like Angela, who you haven't spoken to in a while, reach out to her/him.  I like having friends that live out of town, because they tend to give me a fresh perspective on life.  I also am able to spin my side of things here to my advantage, because they don't know any better.